The Test

TESTING

As a teacher I administer a variety of assessments such as quizzes and essays every two weeks or so. These assessments allow me to appraise students learning over a certain topic.  In both of the readings today we see that a test of some sort was given. However, I never really liked the idea that God tests us especially if I would fail. I was told that the various trials that we encounter during our life are actually tests. How we react to them is actually a test of faith. But this in itself is where I lack an understanding of what faith is. 

I certainly understand the idea of test anxiety as my students seem to freak out with the idea that they have to take tests especially if they have multiple tests in a day. They frequently complain that they are over tested to of which I agree. 

What about God, does he test us much like my students? Some days it seems that my world is that of confusion, anxiety, and lack of direction based upon the various tasks that I have to complete. Should I select A, B, C, or D. Maybe none of the above would be better. Better yet I can just write an essay which I would gravitate to as I don't like the idea of so many choices. God can just listen to my lament about that particular test in a two page discourse of which I can begin with a thesis and then support it with three paragraphs and then a conclusion. Very formulaic. But God doesn't quite work that way.

WHAT I CAN LEARN FROM ABRAHAM

I am familiar with first reading from Paul as he alludes to Abraham and the journey of faith. The key passage is, "By faith Abraham obeyed." (Heb 11:2) Obedience is a difficult concept for me as I have a problem with authority as I view my way or solution as a better path to whatever is suggested. The idea that Abraham did not receive what was promised , but saw it from afar is also troublesome for me as well (Heb 11:13). As suggested in a previous post I want a map. Abraham faith is what allows him to journey into a foreign land encountering each trial knowing that God is guiding him to a land not seen.  

I don't receive outright promises from God about my daily tasks and what lies ahead, but upon reflection I can see that I am guided through this earthly land which in its own is quite foreign as new trials and encounters fill my day. And somehow I come out unscathed.  Taking Paul's suggestion that Abraham as traveler in a land that is temporal, but something better lies ahead provides hope. Of what that homeland might be I can't spend much time thinking for I need to focus on the road in front of me.

ROUGH WATERS

As with many I have encountered the turbulent waters of life which at the time seemed to insurmountable. My response to these trials was much like that of the disciples in Mark (4:35), "don't you not care that I am perishing?" Whether it be family illnesses or personal trials, I would and still do yell out at God in anger, "Where are you?" Other times my reaction would be, "Why me or not this again." 

I have many a time trying to navigate the waters on my own. I have completely given up on God at times. The squalls have thrown me out of the boat and yet for some reason a life line has been extended to so that I can be pulled back in and be seated upright. Must be something about God's grace and mercy. 

"Teacher," the disciples cry out. This is where I as the pupil need to take heed and learn.

MORE TESTS AND MORE TESTS

Recently I have undergone a series of tests to determine the origin of pain in my neck and arms. Two of tests determined nothing, another one is being interpreted and one revealed some issues that most likely require surgery. Yet to this day the origins of the all of the pain are not explained. Most likely more tests will be required before any type of procedure is done.  

My students are assessed in a similar manner throughout the year with tests on different topics as I evaluate what are their mastery levels of the material. So in a way the tests never stop and neither do our life's trials as well as the temptations we encounter which may take us off the road temporarily. 

At times I want to tell God, "This is enough, just give me the answer!"

THE ANSWER

Jesus reminds us to be still and not afraid. This for me is a test. Can I relax and give this trial to God and let Him guide my boat across the turbulent waters? Initially I fail and overreact to the particular trial in front of me, much like a student who encounters a difficult question with many choices. Once settled I can make a decision to be guided.  The choice is not A, B, C or D, it is FSHS. Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. 

Knowing that God the father has my best interest and His son has experienced life on this earth along with trials and tribulations beyond my comprehension provides me with hope.  Also knowing that allowing me to be teachable and opening door to the presence of the Holy Spirit gives me some understanding of the idea of the faith that Abraham exhibited.  

Even an old veteran teacher can still learn.